Sunday, May 7, 2006

May 07, 2006 - Going back to work...

I was just sitting up in bed knitting a few rows of the baby's blanket (I have a LOT of rows left... chances are it won't be finished by the time she arrives, but that's okay... she won't be able to use it right away anyway), and the thought of returning to work came into my mind.  According to one singer (and mom of 2), 4-6 months is a good ballpark.  According to another, 6-9 months is her recommendation.  Worst case scenario is that I have a C-section performed, which will push back my recovery to 9 months from the date of birth.  Holy crap.

I don't think I've ever gone without singing for that long, and I don't know that I will look upon the time away from work with much joy and positive anticipation.  Singing is something that I've done my whole life.  I can't remember a time when it wasn't a part of it.  Be it on stage or off, this is something I love to do, something that always came easily for me, something that didn't take a huge amount of effort.  That is, until I got pregnant.

In my first trimester, I encountered quite a bit of difficulty corrdinating my abdominal core (the center of my singing) with my vocals.  At one concert, a song that I usually didn't have trouble with, all of a sudden threatened to shut my voice down for the rest of the night.  This was something that never happened to me, and I was starting to feel the anxiety and the stress.  Was I going to make it through this night?  I tried to appease myself and everyone else around me (including my very panicky mother) that I would be fine for the second half of the show.  Thankfully, things went on uneventfully.  But the thought still lingered in my head... what if this happens again?  Carnegie Hall was but weeks away.

Thankfully, that concert went splendidly, and I had very little to worry about.

But now on to my current problem.  What's going to happen after I give birth?  What sort of havoc will the physical and hormonal changes wreak on my body?  How will that affect my singing?  How soon will I be able to accept work?  How long will it take to get my body back into fighting and singing shape?  Right now, in my 9th month of pregnancy, singing isn't too difficult.  One song, two songs... not a problem.  But once my belly is emptied of its living and breathing contents, what then?

I know, I know, it's way too early to stress myself out over this.  I know people whose singing has vastly improved since they had their children.  I have friends who have returned successfully to work after childbirth.  I'll be just fine.  I just have to take it easy, let my body recover, take care of my little one and allow time and a slow easing-back into things.  Must let nature take its course. 

Speaking of nature, I'd like for it to take its course soon, as far as this baby's birthdate is concerned.  I'd like to get back to walking without groin pain.

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