Monday, January 28, 2008
- We need more kid singers that actually sound like children... why do they sing Celine, Mariah and Beyonce when they clearly lack the life experience to pull off those songs? I cringe at 10-year-olds singing about lost loves. Please, puwede ba??? Big Spender shouldn't be sung by anyone who isn't legal!
- The Madonna-Whore syndrome...
- When will the NAIA Terminal 3 finally open? It's been sitting there since before Nicole was even a tiny glimmer in my imagination... it's corroding as we speak! Our airports are the first places visitors see when they arrive by air... and we don't get a second chance to make a first impression. SOMEONE PLEASE OPEN UP THAT FIRST IMPRESSION ALREADY!
- I was told about a septic tank truck that reads: "This is where all political promises go." Ha ha ha! Touché! Exactly where NAIA Terminal 3 will end up too unless someone does something now.
- Just saw our new commercial for Baby Spa... Nicole is SO DARN ADORABLE in it!!!
- I hope that Hasbro/Mattel leaves Facebook's Scrabulous alone.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
And just so you know... I'm great with a gun.
(Yes, those of you who are interested may make copies and/or post this on your blogs.)
NAME _____________________________ DATE OF BIRTH ____________
HEIGHT ________ WEIGHT _________ IQ __________ GPA _________
SOCIAL SECURITY #______________ DRIVERS LICENSE #____________
BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES________________________________________
CITY/STATE ____________________________ ZIP______
Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No
Is one male and the other female? ___Yes ___No
If No, explain: _______________________________________________________
Number of years they have been married _________________________________
If less than your age, explain:
A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No
B. A truck with oversized tires? __Yes __No
C. A waterbed? __Yes __No
D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No
E. A tattoo? __Yes __No
F. Do you have an earring, nose ring, __Yes __No
pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring?
(IF YOU ANSWERED 'YES' TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY. I SUGGEST RUNNING.)
In 50 words or less, what does 'LATE' mean to you?
In 50 words or less, what does 'DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER' mean to you?
In 50 words or less, what does 'ABSTINENCE' mean to you?
Church you attend ___________________________________________________
How often you attend ________________________________________________
When would be the best time to interview your:
Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers are confidential.
A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be:
B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:
C: A woman's place is in the:
D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:
E. What do you want to do IF you grow up?
F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:
G. What is the current going rate of a hotel room? __________________________
I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANTI TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.
Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, moron!)
Mother's Signature Father's Signature
Pastor/Priest/ Rabbi State Representative/Congressman
Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual. Please allow four to six years for processing.
You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not try to call or write (since you probably can't, and it would cause you injury). If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two gentlemen wearing white ties carrying violin cases (you might want to watch your back).
To prepare yourself, start studying Daddy's Rules for Dating.
Daddy's Rules for Dating
Your dad's rules for your boyfriend (or for you if you're a guy):
If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're surely not picking anything up.
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.
I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a 'Barrier method' of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.
It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is: 'early.'
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process than can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing or holding hands. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual themes are to be avoided; movies that feature chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.
Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit the car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.
Monday, January 21, 2008
I hadn't gotten enough sleep the night before as my daughter was feeling sick. Rob and I were up at the crack of dawn to make our morning flight to Iloilo, that worry going through my mind. Doing a full concert with only 4 hours of sleep was not going to be easy. We flew in (a bit turbulent on the landing unfortunately)... visited SM City for a brief meet and greet... had lunch... and headed to the hotel for some rest. I forced a nap, just so I could get a few extra minutes. Thankfully I was able to catch a few moments of sleep, then gave myself time to wake up and warm up before going to my sound check. My voice still felt tired. Rats. Only 4 hours of sleep. And a little nap.
I knew I was going to have to do some serious therapeutic warm-ups as taught to me by my voice teacher in London. Really slow and deliberate. I needed to get blood to flow. After a dinner of tinola, I started the warm-up, and continued while my make-up artist was preparing my face and hair for the night. This was going to take time, and I wasn't going to skip or rush.
This was my first night back to singing in concert after my vocal rest. This night was both scary and special.
The concert was going to start late since the rain and heavy traffic was causing a slow audience inflow. I was getting updates in my hotel room about what time the show was to start... it was scheduled for 8, but after all was said and done, we hit our first downbeat closer to 9 to allow for as many people to arrive as possible.
I kept on doing low volume runs to keep my voice warm during the wait... finally, our director Chari called all of us backstage to say a little prayer. I felt the rush of adrenaline start to course through my veins, as well as a little sting of terror. Please, please let this go well, I prayed in my head... just get me through tonight.
I got through... and it felt wonderful.
It felt really, really good to be back at work doing what I love. I felt my confidence return as the show progressed, my voice getting warmer and more pliable with each song that passed. We constructed a relatively easy repertoire to allow for me to just get back in the swing of things and not shock my system... and I think it worked.
To everyone that came to the show, THANK YOU!!! It meant a lot to me that you were so supportive and warm to all of us. We shall most certainly return.
I have my joy back. Oh thank you God, I have my joy back.
Sunday, January 13, 2008
I went to see my doctor today, to check how things are doing on the vocal front. My voice is starting to feel more like normal, as well as sound more normal too, and what he saw confirms it. My vocal chords are looking better, with less swelling. There's still some edema in my larynx, but that's from the infection it suffered last week. In general, things are looking much, much better. I'm still on vocal rest to keep the healing going, and sometime next week I'll start singing, but slowly. I don't want to traumatize the muscles or my chords. After what I've been through, I'd better start easy.
It goes without saying that I'm in better spirits knowing that my vocal apparatus is well on its way to a full recovery. I have another week before Iloilo; I think I'll be just fine.
Oh... Jed Madela is my special guest for both Bacolod and Iloilo. I just thought to let you all know, in case you didn't already.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Also... WE HAVE A PS3!!!
We just hooked it up and it looks absolutely gorgeous. From the on-screen instructions to the actual piece of hardware, it's a beautiful, sleek, graceful machine. As cool as I thought the Xbox was (and still is), I have to say, this is the gamer's Lamborghini.
I'm sure that before this night is through, we'll have tried the games or seen the bundled Blu-Ray movie, Spiderman 3. In any case, this was far better than just a dinner out... this is heaven, baby!
Especially now that there isn't much I can do while quiet. Sure I can go out, but I can't really talk to anyone. I'm typing this entry with a Tomy Megasketcher by my side to help me "talk".
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
I'm also excited about starting Jigoku Shoujo (Hell Girl) on Animax... I never got to see the series from the beginning, so when I learned it would come back on Animax, I set my DVR to record the episodes. I was home tonight though, so I watched it. Really well done. Case Closed and Witch Hunter Robin are other favorites... the all-time classic favorite though is Voltes V.
The rest of my day was spend answering email and twiddling with Facebook. Man, that place can get pretty chaotic!
That's about it... I'm still on antibiotics and other supporting medication. I'm feeling better, but my body's telling me that its recovery isn't yet complete.
Okay... time now to hit the showers and play with the Gamecube...
Monday, January 7, 2008
I guess this is God's way to make me rest. I've been running at full throttle these last few weeks, what with packing up our house, going on a cruise and caring for a toddler. My body just decided to shut down, forcing me to stay put and rest. And rest is what I shall do.
I'm sorry to my fans in Bacolod, but we shall reschedule the show for January 26.
Haaaaaay, I hate being silent.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
So yeah... I'm human after all.
It's a bit difficult to be silent again... the last time I had to impose non-usage of my vox was way back in 1990. It's now 2008, which is a good indication of how well I've taken care of my voice ever since then.
But yeah, it's been a busy time, and people have been getting sick left and right these days. One of my cousins (who watched my show last night) was sick too.
So... right now... I'm trying to rest myself, just keeping away from any unnecessary stress. I've got the Venture Brothers on TV and a hot shower waiting. Maybe once this phlegm wad is dislodged, I can be on the road to recovery.
To those waiting for me in Bacolod on January 12, I'll be there! I might contruct an easier, less-stressful repertoire, but rest assured I'll be there. There's yummy kadios to be had!
Thursday, January 3, 2008
My daughter is in love with this movie, and whenever the song-&-dance sequences begin, she starts to sway along. This is her first musical, and I think the indoctrination shall continue with more classic movie musicals and live shows staged by her theatrical titos and titas, mwehehehehehehe.
If you haven't yet seen this film, get your copy on DVD. I couldn't stop smiling once the opening credits rolled.