Saturday, October 6, 2007

October 06, 2007 - Familiarity

As the old adage goes, familiarity breeds contempt. Someone must have gotten pissed off enough by a best friend, family member or lover to have come up with that zinger.

I've always been one to keep just about everyone at arm's length, certain filial relations included. Enough shit has happened in my life that my DNA now includes a "proceed with caution" warning that flashes periodically when I meet new people. Proceed with caution... this person may just f*** you up later. Happened to people I love, I've witnessed; could also happen to me.

Yes I've been described as transparent by people closest to me as I don't hide my emotions of the moment. Whatever pops in my head will come out of my mouth... sometimes my brain will be bypassed completely. However, there will always be parts of me that will remain inaccessible to the world because I don't want to get hurt. In case you didn't know, getting hurt sucks ass.

Familiarity runs both ways, however, and I don't like getting too, too familiar either. My knowing too much... the dirty little secrets I wasn't supposed to hear... the dark truths that should never be seen by my daylight... that screws me up too. I don't know why that is, it just is I guess.

So everyone I know, knows me only so much... only to a certain point... hanggang diyan ka lang. And everyone I know, I know only so much.

No exceptions... no special considerations. It's not about wanting to keep an air of mystery, it's all about staying safe.

And happy.

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