First of all... to everyone that saw my Tarrytown concert last Friday, THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!!! I had an incredible time in that beautiful theater.
Now, back to my late night ramblings...
Prior to the Tarrytown performance I received news of yet another theater couple becoming uncoupled... needless to say I was angered and incensed. The reason for their separation is a third party with whom the husband's doing a show. My agent had to say, "they went by the way of the showmance."
Ah, the showmance... it can be heady and intoxicating. You don't always think straight and the temptation is so great, that you feel almost compelled to give in to your baser instincts, without any consideration for your outstanding and pre-existing commitments. It's the theater equivalent of the office romance... when two people meet at work and get it on. Sometimes it's magical... sometimes it's raw and animalistic... the chemistry's undeniable and the relationship so intense... the two people involved have stars in their eyes and feel like they can conquer the world together.
That is, until the show ends its run, or when someone leaves the show for another.
And where does that leave the aggrieved party? Last I heard, she's doing just fine. I don't know if she and her husband will eventually reconcile... I can't blame her if she decides to go the way of divorce, nor would I wonder why if she and her husband decide to put the transgressions aside and work things out.
In an ideal world, a marriage is greater than the sum of its parts. It's never about one or the other anymore, but of the two as a unit and a team. It's about reaching a state of grace... it's about unconditional love... it's about forgiveness and patience. It's the recognition that this is a union that a Higher Power has forged, that no one should disprespect and try to break.
Realistically however, it's about two imperfect beings attempting to reach a state of divine perfection together. And in this real world, not everyone is successful. However, I believe that it's enough to try, and try very hard.
We're all human... we'll all have our failings and foibles... we'll all have that moment of "I f****d up big time". But God in His perfect grace will always be ready to forgive us... hopefully, we and our partners will be willing to do the same.
If and when the fight is worth fighting, it's worth swinging and swinging hard, the figurative broken jaw and split lip notwithstanding. However, sometimes, one must also know when to hang up the gloves and walk away.
I wish this couple the best of luck, whatever they decide.